MTV Video Music Awards host Russell Brand thinks Brad and Angelina’s biological babies are too good looking.
“I don’t think they should breed, those two people. I think their adoption policy is probably better because when their genes come together, it creates a storm of attractiveness so potent that it could one day bring down the planet,” he told UK newspaper The Sun.
The Forgetting Sarah Marshall star, who just filmed a suggestive VMA promo with Britney Spears, added, “No one needs a baby with eight-inch-long eyelashes.”
Tune in to watch Russell host the VMAs on MTV live Sunday September 7th at 9pm ET.
In an amazing feat of self-control, Britney Spears recently sat down with OK! magazine for a photoshoot and interview and did not wipe chicken wing grease on anything! She even spoke - without a British accent - to the rag, and revealed that she might just have an ounce of sanity under that weave after all! When asked about if she’d support her two sons pursuing a career in showbiz, Mama Brit said:
“I’d rather not. But but I’d love them unconditionally if they wanted to. I’d just as soon they have a more normal childhood.”
It’s a nice gesture and all, but Britney has already given them two years of f*cking crazy, so it might be kinda hard to give them that “normal childhood” she’s craving. She probably should have thought of this new mothering plan back when she was locking herself naked in the bathroom as the police were circling her mansion. But, you know. They’re probably to young to remember that crazy sh*t. [MSNBC]
We are finally going to be privy to all of Lynne Spears‘ mediocre inner thoughts about her daughters Britney and Jamie-Lynn, thanks to her new book, Through The Storm. We wish she had titled it Through the Natty, Plastic Weave On My Daughter’s Shaved Head, but some editor probably shot that one down. The book promises to cover all the juicy highlights from The Year (or two) That Britney Went Bat-Sh*t Crazy, such as:
“Lynne’s backseat role in Britney’s path to fame and how it forever changed their family
Her regret in abdicating parental authority to managers, agents, and record companies
The challenges that shaped Lynne and Jamie’s marriage and how that affected Bryan, Britney, and Jamie Lynn
Her response to Jamie Lynn’s pregnancy
The startling events that led to Britney’s meltdown and Lynne’s showdown with manager Sam Lufti
How faith, family, and friendships have been her harbor in the storm of paparazzi, tabloid scribblers, and gossip hounds”
Well what do you know - Britney Spears and Russell Brand have palpable chemistry in these promo ads for the VMAs! Brand is a notorious sex addict who penned a book about his appetite for women. “I had a harem of about 10 women, whom I would rotate in addition to one-night stands and random casual encounters,” he wrote of his horniest days. Britney is, well, Britney.And that seems to be a dangerous combination.
Britney Spears, VMA host Russell Brand, and a 900-pound “elephant in the room” filmed a promo for the MTV awards show, creating further buzz that the pop star will return this year in an attempt to redeem herself after last year’s lackluster performance. In the promo, Russell suggests there is sexual tension between them, but Britney shrugs, “I didn’t feel any tension.”
Britney’s “Piece of Me” has been nominated this year for two “Moonmen” in the Best Female and Best Pop Video categories, but her attendance has not been confirmed.
“Everyone deserves a second or third chance, right?” MTV president Van Toffler teased in June.
The Telegraph is reporting that Britney Spears is a go for Quentin Tarantino’s planned remake of the Russ Meyer sexploitation classic Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill! Some may question whether it’s a good idea for Britney to play the leader of a murderous pack of lesbian strippers on the lam. Some might also suggest Tarantino focus on that damn World War II epic he’s been promising for years instead of releasing yet another mega-derivative film about hot women driving fast and kicking people. We call these people “spoil-sports.” [The Telegraph]
Pics of Britney in Cabo San Lucas below:
Britney Spears and George Maloof take a vacation in Mexico, July 27, 2008. (Photo: Splash News)
Britney Spears and George Maloof take a vacation in Mexico, July 27, 2008. (Photo: Splash News)
Britney Spears and George Maloof take a vacation in Mexico, July 27, 2008. (Photo: Splash News)
Let us journey back in time, to a world where Britney Spears was beautiful and her golden locks were real (maybe). The year was 2003, the girls were decked out in white wedding dresses better suited for streetwalkers, and they only had eyes–or lips–for one lady: the Queen of Pop and Pointy Bras, Madonna. That September, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera joined their idol onstage at the MTV Video Music Awards and turned a regular performance into headline news when they each took turns tongue-kissing Madge while singing her timeless tramp anthem “Like a Virgin.”
The timing of their tonsil hockey was perfect, providing a much-needed jolt to Brit’s suffering career. It had been a tumultuous year of disappointing record sales, a high-profile breakup from Justin Timberlake (which inspired his #1 hit “Cry Me a River”), her disastrous film flop Crossroads, and the closing of her restaurant NYLA after just seven months. Plus she had a new album to promote, packed with horny dance tracks celebrating masturbation and other hot ‘n’ breathy behavior. Yup, a girl kiss is just what she needed. Britney later claimed she had “never kissed a woman before” — even though they had seriously rehearsed the smooch before the actual performance. (Sadly, an ass-slap from Madge was canned before they went live.) Still, that one sultry, same-sex lip-lock freaked the pundits and titillated our whole nation. And our girl finally became a (bi-curious) woman.
We’re a little wary of anything that might derail Britney Spears‘ progress as a human being - she’s come such a long way since she was locking herself in the bathroom naked with her baby. But just as crazy as Brit is, she is also horny, and girlfriend’s gotta get her bone on. So Brit’s allegedly banging her bodyguard, an Israeli soldier (!!!) named Lee who’s been protecting the star for six months.
In the past, Sam Lutfi would have uttered some weird comment about dating the dude, or worse, say nothing at all. But luckily, Britney 2.0 has a manager again! And good ol’ Larry Rudolph told Access Hollywood that “There is no truth to this at all. Britney is 100% single.” Even if she is bangin’ the bodyguard, we’ll never know otherwise. Which is really how it should be. [Photo: Splash News]
Remember ol’ crazy face Sam Lutfi? You know, the BritBrit hanger on who alleged drugged up the diva in an attempt to control her? Yes, that winner. After Britney’s parents filed a strict restraining order against Sam, he’s been nowhere to be found, probably because he’s been busy working double shifts at Denny’s. But apparently Sam is back on the scene and ready to fight the restraining order that’s kept him away from Britney, her pill supply and her credit cards since February 1st. A hearing is scheduled for tomorrow to address whether the restraining order should be made permanent, and Sammy’s supposedly coming to fight!
“Sam won’t sign a permanent stay-away,” says a source nuts enough to be friends with the guy. “If they want to go to trial, he will go to trial. He did nothing wrong.” Oh come on, dude. We all saw her weave for those six months of friendship. He did A LOT wrong. Like, 3000 plastic hairs worth of damage.
Britney Spears is on vacation this week in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, with hotelier George Maloof. Because, you know, being a little bit less insane is seriously hard work.
But for reals - Brit looks pretty good! We don’t see any daiquiri stains on her white bikini yet, surely that is a good sign. We like that her friend is filming the pool party with a giant video camera from 1984. All Brit needs is a couple more tequila shots, and that sex tape is finally gonna happen.
Britney Spears and George Maloof take a vacation in Mexico, July 27, 2008. (Photo: Splash News)
Britney Spears and George Maloof take a vacation in Mexico, July 27, 2008. (Photo: Splash News)
Britney Spears and George Maloof take a vacation in Mexico, July 27, 2008. (Photo: Splash News)
